End of one track

Well yesterday we officially finished the twelve week long first track of Intro to IHOP-KC. I finished on a bit of a downer because I realised I have had a really bad attitude all along and have complained a lot and grumbled and been frustrated so much that it took my joy away. I'm sure that if I had a car, it would have been different. It is really hard not having a car, not being able to go where I want to go, shop when I want to shop, have the freedom to chill on my own, go to places on my own, or tuck away spare clothes in my car. Instead, I have had to lug whatever I can in my backpack as much as possible. Aggggh, so awkward. I have needed a lot of grace.

Then on top of that I have had to deal with this crazy dysfunctional family God decided to place me into. Their emails are extremely discouraging and disheartening and have kept me busy in prayer every day. Then I have loads of people back home emailing me their prayer points on a regular basis.

Farewell to my Texan parents

Today marks the end of a season of intense divine fellowship with James and Nikki, this amazing couple from Texas who became my adopted parents for my first three months in KC.

During this time they have lavished me with love, fed me, sown nuggets of gold into my heart, shared testimonies with me, prayed with me, celebrated my birthday with me, driven me to classes, sat with me in meetings, hugged me, cried with me, and just beed the most marvellous friends to me.

They have taught me how to set boundaries and love people who are broken. They have deeply encouraged me and been stable mentors for me. They have been so loyal, faithful, reliable and trustworthy and taught me to be a better friend to others. Gosh, I just love them so much.They will be leaving Missouri today to drive back to Texas - a 12-hour drive stopping halfway at some place to rest.

James is an orthopaedic surgeon on the Mercy ship. He coordinates a medical team on there. Nikki is a trauma nurse. They live on a huge ranch that they call the Mercy Ranch. Praise the Lord for these two amazing people. They have made such a huge impact on me :-)

One of those days

Feeling kind of weird today. I decided not to go to class because I didn't want to have to stand up and give my testimony about what track 1 has done for me. I feel a bit selfish for that being my main reason for not making the effort to go, especially because Brooke told me she had such a great time and that it was optional, not mandatory. Urrrgh! Anyway, but also, I was just feeling a bit low.

Yesterday Brooke was having a really bad day and it really showed. She was in a really shitty mood and all emotional because we heard a lady called Laurie Ditto tell about how she went to hell. She was literally translated there and she described extremely vividly how she felt, what she saw and what she heard. As a result of her experience, she was physically extremely ill - passing out white diarhoea, she had acid-like scabs inside her mouth and nose and was severely dehydrated and everything. Oh it was just awful. Nothing worse. I managed to zone out after about 15 minutes because I had my computer with me so I hooked up to FB and read my emails and did some net surfing. Brooke wasn't able to do that and clung onto every word and it deeply affected her. Poor kid.

Anyway, it was probably a mistake dragging her out to Ariane's house miles away, to the shops and to the Olive Tree for dinner cos she was just so emotional. Ariane had also had a really bad day at work and I accidentally bashed her car door into a pole and it got dented. I think the collective negativity poured into this new day. I was feeling ok last night, but it's like it just cast a dark presence over my new day :-(

So today, I have just been moping around the house doing very little other than eating, playing on the computer, trying on clothes, putting on make-up and playing with Teva - the indoor cat that adores me. A few of the YWAM girls wrote on my FB wall today, which was really sweet. Gosh I wish I was their age again. Not with where I was at in my life, but now with my mindset and their youth. I feel like I'm getting really old. I guess I should be grateful that God has given me a nice healthy figure and good skin so that people even think I am their age.

Last Saturday I had the strangest dream in which I was sitting with a guy who I think might be the one God has chosen for me. He was absolutely gorgeous but not at all what I expected my future husband to look like - I guess because I have always put so much emphasis on him looking a certain way. The thing that stood out to me is that he had really lovely skin. He looked extremely fit and healthy and was just so radiant. I just loved him. His face was full of compassion and kindness. He was looking at me with such a depth of love. No one has ever looked at me like that. He really loved me. I could not tell his eye colour because of the sparkle in his eyes. He was full of the Spirit of God because he loved God. His head was shaved, so i could not tell his hair colour, but he was Caucasian, i'm pretty sure and fair. He was wearing a pure white radiant almost fluorescent white t-shirt.

He handed me a piece of paper and it had the grades he had received from some units he had studied. My initial thought was "wow, this guy has similar skills and is employable". Also on the paper was his contact details and he had written his age as "between 22 and 33".

In another scene we were in mum's front garden at her outdoor table, which was its original colour and had been restored. I looked around the garden and everything was strangely in order. She was right with God and at peace and her home was beautiful. The Lord had restored to her what the devil had stolen from her life and I felt this deep peace and happiness inside me.

How bizarre. As soon as I woke up I remembered the words of a little old lady in the prophetic prayer room at IHOP who told me the Lord was going to give me some dreams and I was to write down the exact details of what I saw.

This guy remains at the back of my mind as I meet all these single guys at IHOP. None as amazing as the guy in my dream.

Ariane (and her dog Carmen) and Brooke

Brooke and Teva

Wireless again

Wow, lots has happened since the last miserable post! For some weird reason my computer lost its ability to pick up the wireless internet in our house, so I couldn't log on for ages. So frustrating. Barb said I could use her PC, but she has a very dodgy old cranker of a PC and she hasn't upgraded software for so long that a lot of the images and applications on web pages remain closed. What a pain! ...then in the global prayer room, they have wireless internet, but we are not allowed to use Facebook there and I can't do personal things like banking for obvious reasons.

Well praise the Lord some IT person came and hooked me back up to the network. Gosh, you don't realise what a luxury it is until you lose it.

I have just come home from dinner and shopping with Ariane and Brooke. I am so tired, I just need to crash. I spent just over two hours on my knees today in the prayer room. I just needed to do that. I am over worrying about what people think. If I cannot kneel down and pray to my Lord and have sweet fellowship with Him there in the global prayer room, then I really have no idea where else to do it. To heck with pleasing people. I don't give a hoot anymore. All that matters to me are my precious times with Jesus. I crave His presence like the deserts crave the rain.

One day in His courts is better than a thousand days elsewhere.

Sad

Feeling rather gutted tonight. I keep getting the most awful emails from Julz and mum. I have prayed for them so much since i've been here, yet the contents of their emails are so incredibly discouraging and negative :-( Oh why must everything become so dark before the light comes? I know breakthrough is coming though. It has to be with all these prayers and because I know God is so faithful. He will never disappoint us.

Global Prayer Room

Lord, give those called to be messengers uncommon favor. Make Your face shine upon them. Give them faces like angels. Anoint their lips so that when they speak what is on Your heart and so their words will be received by those who don't know You.

Lord for leaders in israel, we pray You will soften their hearts and prepare their hearts so that they would be like good soil that receives the seeds of truth. We pray it would be life to their bodies and health to all their flesh and that it would be a lamp to their feet and a light to their path.

Global Bridegroom Fast

They do this three-day fast on the first three Mon, Tues and Wed of every month, all the IHOP staff and students and we are fasting for:

• the fullness of the Holy Spirit and unity in the Church
• the great harvest
• a youth revival movement
• revival in Israel
• houses of prayer
• the wealth of the nations
• divine protection of all that is birthed through prayer

I am also claiming the benefits of Isaiah 58 over my family and friends.

Breakthrough time

Last night I listened to the first CD of a seven-set series from Katie Souza, a lady with a very radical testimony and healing ministry. Some time back, it was prophesied over me in IHOP that I would receive a strategy to disarm the enemies strongholds in Juliet's life and the demons would be scattered and flee. Well, I know w/o a doubt now that what I have in my hands is powerful. I spent last night seeing demons.

In one case, i was holding a blonde baby boy with blue eyes. I was carrying him around and loving on him and I sensed there was something not quite right about him. He was wrapped in too many layers. I realised his mother was very ill and she was not coping, so he had been neglected. I was so full of love for this kid, I was singing over him in tongues and just connecting with him and I could feel his love for me. I realised his nappy was wet and so I walked for ages trying to find his mum. She was nowhere in sight, but I sensed she was very ill.

In another scene, I was driving a car along a dark windy road. There were demonic characters dancing on the roads and laughing and clouding my vision. It was dangerous.

I do not remember the other scenes. I just know that all those demonic suckers are going to be fleeing very soon.

I am on the Global Bridegroom Fast with IHOP - a three day fast and I have taken today off to pray and listen to these CDs. It is hope for me and Nikki. I long for the day that my sister will be set free from sexual and drug addictions and walk in true freedom and liberty. I know it is coming soon. GLORY TO THE KING OF KINGS.

My birthday in Kansas City

Had the most amazing birthday this year. I actually woke up feeling really sad and down - I just never expected my life to turn out the way it has.

Anyways, but then I went to the bathroom and discovered that my housemates and put streamers up on my door and little posters around the house with scriptures on it. When I went into the kitchen, my new German housemate who is here for 9 days sung happy birthday to me in her rich German accent. That made my day.

Then Barb came up the stairs with a bunch of flowers and a bag of beautifully wrapped gifts. She and Tina bought me a blue sunvisor, yellow bandana, red journal and colourful compact umbrella. Then I opened up my computer to find many birthday wishes on facebook, which was a blessing. Mum remembered my bday and said she bought me a new car key. Julz said she would deposit money into my bank account.

Then Nikki came and picked Ondrea and I up and we went to the International House of Pancakes, where we met a group of lovely women plus Michael Kurland. I was actually grateful all the other guys either chose to sleep-in or attend the Joseph Conference with Rick Joyner because we were unable to book a table, so we had to wait until they could clear enough tables for us. We had 13 in total. It was both Martha and my birthday.

Nikki bought us both beautiful scarfs. Kathleen bought us both flowers. Michael made us both a little craft masterpiece - he cut out the letters of words in Hebrew and gave us both a scripture that he felt God was saying to us. The word he wrote on mine was "lovely" and he quoted Song of Solomon 4:7. That blessed me more than any other gift. He gave Martha the word "peace" and Isaiah 26:3. Then Brooke bought me Justin Rizzo's latest CD, two mandarins and a chocolate bar and gave me a card that had the sweetest words on it. Martha gave me a beautiful candle and some wasabi almonds. Jess wrote her favourite scriptures on a card to me. Ariane gave me a scarf, shirt and bracelet (all looked really expensive). I was just so blessed by everyone.

Then we went and did ushering at the Joseph Conference and took some piccies. After the conference, Addy drove Jess, Brooke and a korean girl whose name i don't remember, to Price Choppers where we bought some cake. We then went back to Jess's house and they put candles on it and wished me a happy birthday. I was really touched by that. We went to church and then after church, I went home and had LOADS more Facebook messages wishing me a happy birthday. I was overwhelmed at the volume - like about 60 Australians, Mexicans and Americans and then some others from other countries. I met them through YWAM.

Even today, I was still feeling extremely loved and blessed as others came and blessed me. Praise the Lord.

Words of life

I'm sitting here in the Global Prayer Room at IHOP soaking in the Word of God that is being put to music in a "Worship with the Word" two-hour prayer room set. The musicians and singers are amazing and I can feel God's presence in this room.

The last week has been a really awesome week for me and i've felt really pumped up in prayer. I was really blessed to attend a couple of social events which turned into a time of prophecy. I realise that any sort of social occasion with IHOP people will always turn into a time of ministry and words of life being imparted. I love the new friends i have made - they are just amazing people and passionate about serving God whole-heartedly.

Today, we heard some amazing testimonies of how God had miraculously answered desperate prayers for safety in Joplin, the area near us that was devastated by a tornado just over a week ago, resulting in 200 deaths. One man heard his young son screaming and looked out the window to see his son caught up in the air in the tornado! He cried out to God to spare his son - at the moment, his son was released from the tornado and miraculously was thrown back into the house through the window unharmed!!!!

Other people climbed into wardrobes, bath tubs and hid under kitchen tables crying out to God to spare their lives. Those places were protected and they survived unharmed! Many volunteers from IHOP have gone down to Joplin intending to minister to the people, but have ended up feeling as though they have been ministered to after hearing the testimonies of God's grace in the midst of such devastation. The great news is that two prayer houses have been set up and have been overflowing with people. Everyone they have asked has been receptive to prayer and lots of people have received Jesus as a result of seeing His protection and hearing the gospel. Praise the Lord!

We have spent much time praying over Joplin. I was absolutely heart-broken seeing the extent of the damage (you can see some of the photos here), so it's great to hear the testimonies of what God is doing there.

Time to ponder

Feeling a bit gutted today. Brooke had a couple of prophecies talking about marriage and it's been the prayer on her heart for so long. All of a sudden, out of the blue, her Prince Charming appears out of no where and after talking to him, I really think they are an excellent match. They are the same age, both their dads are engineers and their mums are stay-at-home mums, they are both new Christians and have had wild past experiences, they seem to be at the same stage in their walk with God - both searching and trying to get closer to God, they are equally attractive and he has a great job as a fireman, which he beat 1000's of applicants to get. He is half Italian and half Spanish and loves cooking, swimming and working out. I'm really happy for them, but now that means I have lost my best friend in KC and they are together today getting to know each other.

Last night was awesome. Our team met with another team and this other team have really developed their prophetic ministry gifts. They decided to prophesy over us. Everything they said ministered to my heart. Michael Kim said he saw me on the waters in a storm and the waters were filled with sharks and it was very dangerous, and though he said others would be too afraid and probably crushed in these circumstance, I was bold and courageous and strong. He said the Lord has heard my prayers. He said that I have been fighting for so long and the breakthrough would come. His wife said she had a vision of me diving into an ocean and being confident in the waters, whereas others she imagined would be afraid and just keep to shallow waters. Her vision really touched me because it reminded me of a dream i had many years ago - I dived off a cliff into the ocean and I was a power swimmer (total contrast to real life - I can't dive and am not that great at swimming!).

Michael also said that the Lord wanted me to know I was beautiful and that many women feel that they are declining in beauty over time, but that I was becoming more beautiful. That was sweet. Another thing he said that touched me deeply is that the Lord had given me a garden and I had been faithful in tending that garden, so He was going to give me a bigger garden. The reason that ministered to me so deeply was because when I almost ended my life at 16, the dream I had was in the most beautiful garden, and also a lady from the w/o walls prophetic tent saw a vision of big gates opening in front of me to reveal and beautiful garden.

MaryGrace said she saw a vision of a sail boat for me and said the wind (symbolic of the Holy Spirit) was directing the boat across the water and that I would follow the Holy Spirit's leading to many places. She also saw me as a boulder and said she saw it rolling fast and scattering the enemies against me. She said I was like a fire ball. She said she felt the Lord had given me eyes to see through peoples' outward exteriors and into their heart to see what state they are in spiritually. Michael said he often felt I could look at people and see right into their hearts too. He said he felt the fear of the Lord when I looked at him. Interesting.

He also said he always thought of me as very tough, strong and confident, but that he felt the Lord say that He wanted to bring out a very gentle soft side, like a cadbury creme egg with a hard shell and soft inside.

Kathleen saw me with a sword wielding it competently. She also said the Lord delights in me.

Jess said she felt led to read me Psalm 139 about how I cannot escape from God - He will always be thinking of me and physically with me no matter where God takes me.

Sick on Sunday

So I woke up today feeling really sick and just in no way capable of doing my kiddies church shift, so I messaged Martha to say I just wouldn't be going and that I felt too unwell to find a replacement. Thank goodness she said she had me covered. I am hoping she roped her daughter into doing it so that way I would not have to return the favor. Yeah I know, I am just over this intense schedule!

The thing that has bee grieving my heart the last few days is this issue with human trafficking that keeps getting brought up in prayer and conversations at IHOP. I did some research after participating in the intercession set last Thursday and getting intensely emotional and broken over the issue. What happens is these really poor women from countries such as Argentina (we prayed for Buenos Aires last Thursday) see adverts to change their situation. Deceptive corrupt American companies offer to pay then $10 US/hr to do things like cleaning. So then the woman will sell everything they own to pay for the working visa to America. They get their visa, everything seems fine and they arrive in America at their place of employment, only to then find they have made a fatal decision into sex slavery.

These women become trapped by these sick perverted criminals and they cannot escape because:

1. firstly, they are often locked up;
2. secondly, a lot of them cannot speak fluent english, if any english;
3. thirdly, being forced to have sex with 25 men in one night every night destroys their self esteem and ability to speak up for themselves;
4. fourthly, the immigration laws they entered the country through, actually bind them to their employer so they cannot work for anyone else; and
5. finally, they have no money as their employer doesn't pay them, but exploits them to earn thousands of dollars every night for their own crooked purposes.

I watched a documentary of one woman who was forced to "work" for these criminals for two years until she fell pregnant. Then they dumped her upon hearing the news. She was lucky. She managed to alert the authorities and they have helped her. Others are not so fortunate.

My heart has been in torment over these women. Being an international student, and having travelled into Mexico and Cambodia, I understand the visa issues and the language barriers. My heart is just aching to see these women set free. They lose everything and become prisoners. Oh Lord, please bring justice to them.

Nothing impossible with God

Yesterday, I woke up late – too late to get a ride to class, so I had to take the day off as a personal day. I was feeling really run down, so I guess that was a good thing. I also needed to do some serious shopping, so the timing was good because James and Nikki also took the day off and were heading to Walmart in the arvo.

Before we left, we ate a meal together and Nikki told me about her daughter. She was previously married to an alcoholic drug addict, who was denied custody of their children after it became obvious he was a threat to their health and welfare. When Nikki’s daughter Sarah was 11, she used to cry to see her daddy again, who lived in another state in America. One day Nikki gave in to her daughter and ex-husband’s plea’s to see each other. She made the mistake of allowing her daughter to see her dad for one week.

Well Nikki is not sure exactly what happened, but later found out her ex-husband left her precious daughter in the “care” of his drug addict gf and two guys during the day when he left. She suspects her daughter was drugged and raped and put through absolute torment during that time. Twice she received frantic phone calls from the daughter screaming “where are you mum?”. On the second call, Nikki told her daughter to find an adult or police officer and get them to take her to the biggest hospital in the state and that she would drive three hours to meet her in that hospital.

Nikki arrived and waited there for hours and hours and hours until finally the daughter arrived. She said from that day on her daughter was never the same and she has never found out to this day exactly what happened. What followed were obvious demonic manifestations through her daughter – her daughter would tear off her clothes, cut herself with glass, rip off her own skin, curse and swear and roar. She attacked people who came near her, even grown men and with such force that she would injure people – even as a young small girl! Her school years were destroyed and she could no longer engage or relate to people.

They moved her from school to school and sought all the help they could get from anywhere and everywhere, but to no avail.

In her early 20s a man escaped from prison in the area where her daughter lived and raped her. He also bit her all over her body and put her through even more hell. The whole family went to the hospital where she was chained to the bed because of the violent reactions she would have. It was then they agreed that she be taken to a mental hospital. Nikki has not spoken to her daughter for over a year because the daughter has refused to have anything to do with her. She ended up getting out of the mental hospital and got married to a man who truly loves her, but he is not a Christian and her life is a total wreck. She can’t work or function as a normal human.

Nikki spent the day crying her heart out on Thursday, the day I spent the afternoon sobbing over human trafficking victims. She said at Pure Heart on Tuesday they said they wanted to minister to women with issues relating to mother-daughter relationships and the need for restoration. My heart just broke hearing her story. I cannot imagine how difficult it must be facing all that – and it all started with one bad decision when her daughter was 11. Oh Lord, all we can do is pray.

The things that matter to God

Today was another very interesting day. Brooke stayed in bed and took the day off - good for her! As for me, I walked down to James and Nikki's house and started my day bright and early with a cup of their hazelnut coffee and a slice of banana bread. Gosh I just love the two of them so much. I'm so grateful they are in my life and they are so easy-going and accepting of me. What am I going to do when they return home to Texas at the end of June? Anyway, I told them about the amazing prophetic ministry I had yesterday and how I had spent the night thinking about it so much that I barely slept. Nikki asked me what the words spoken over me were, so I read them out to her.

Then we picked up Phil, some married older guy who lives at Herrnhut in a nearby apartment, and drove to class. Nikki and I went and got some coffee before going back to class. I sat with John. Then we moved classrooms and I sat with Martha. As usual I joined the rapid fire prayer line and threw in my small contribution. They just invited ten people, so I leapt out of my seat to be one of the lucky ten :-) I don't know why I have such a craving all the time to participate.

Today's topic was gratitude, so I said something like "Father God, thank You that You are a God of many miracles, a God through whom absolutely nothing is impossible. Thank You that no situation is without hope because of You. Thank You that You are Elohim, Almighty Creator of the world and even though You are so awesome, the things that matter to us, matter to You. You know us intimately and You will perfect all that concerns us. Thank You that You will never leave us nor forsake us and there's not a minute of any day that You're not part of our lives. Thank You Jesus". The words I prayed were simple and sweet.

Then I caught a ride with James and Nikki and got them to drive through the Burger King drive through so I could grab a burger before being dropped off at the Global Prayer Room early. I went in almost an hour early and sat and typed up the prophetic words I got yesterday. I also read my email and typed up my rapid fire prayer. At 2pm, I left to attend our team briefing and in the absence of Zack, Lindsey did a very cool activity where she got us all to close our eyes, hold out our hands and then she placed one penny and one nickel into two different people's hands, before asking us all to put our hands under the table and not look at the coins we had, if we had them. Then everyone had to pray for a word for the person with each coin without knowing who the person was that they were prophesying over.

Well it proved to be absolutely amazing. The majority of the words I got were all words I have had spoken over my life before and I really felt they were genuine words from God....

1) Saw a fisherman and felt the Lord say you are a fisher of men, that He will use you to lead others to salvation. Saw you as a lighthouse – guiding people to the Lord and also applicable to your family (John Lee).

2) Proverbs 3:5-6 – trust in the lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path (My own word over myself! - lol).

3) Psalm 21:1-2 – the Lord is my light and my salvation, who shall I fear. The Lord if the stronghold of my life, in whom shall I be afraid? Relationship with the Lord will bring Godly and like-minded people into your life. Saw the word “comforter” and believe the Lord is comforting you. Saw a yellow soothing colour – the Lord is comforting you. Rest in Him – He is your lifeline (Ryan Jordan).

4) Felt the Lord wanted to give you the following scriptures:

Judges 6:12 - And the Angel of the LORD appeared to him, and said to him, “The LORD is with you, you mighty man of valor!”.

Judges 6:14 - Then the LORD turned to him and said, “Go in this might of yours, and you shall save Israel from the hand of the Midianites. Have I not sent you?”

…. encouragement about how He sees you. Heard Him say listen to who the Lord says you are and to trust your inner man. Felt as though the penny thinks it is a penny, but God sees it as gold (Neville Corbett).

5) Saw a vision of a black strong sketch of you – interpreted as though you are receiving from the Lord things of the Spirit, infilling with joy and grace (Lindsey Voss).

That was awesome!

So then we returned to the prayer room and I typed up my words, prayed some scriptures over my family and did my own thing. Then at around 4.30pm, I heard the prayer leader begin the topic of intercession into the microphone and the topic was human trafficking. As soon as he started, I felt I was meant to put everything away and go up the front of the room. As I sat down, I began to pray in tongues and then weep for the victims of human trafficking. It was so weird. I wept and wept as people watched me. I switched between tongues and scriptures in prayer all between my tears, while all the time thinking about what I would pray into the microphone when it was my turn.

I realised God wanted me to intercede for the victims and that His heart was so broken for them. It didn't matter to me that our shift in the prayer room had finished. God was not finished with me and while the other students in my track all left, I remained. I joined the rapid fire line and ended up praying through tears something like "Father God, we lift up the victims of human trafficking before you and we pray that you would put a new song in the mouths today, that as they offer up those songs of praise to you and give thanks to you because You are a good God, we pray that You would enable supernatural deliverance. Thank you Jesus".

Then I sat down and listened to how everyone else prayed and when the prayer leaders were all done, I got up and left. Some pretty blonde American girl called Whitney pulled my arm on the way out and asked me if I knew some girl from Australia. She said she heard my Australian accent. I said no and then she asked me how long I was staying in America for. I told her six months to do the internship. I told her I had been bawling my eyes out over the issue of human trafficking and that it was so weird because I don't know anyone personally involved in it and yet my heart was so broken for the victims. Then I said I had to go. She smiled and I said "nice to meet you" and left.

As I walked home, I wondered why God had touched my heart. Again I felt weird about breaking down in front of all these curious eyes watching me. I didn't know any of them and felt kind of embarrassed. The Lord is doing something in my heart.

Wednesday

Today was interesting. When Brooke and I were sitting in class, John suddenly came up to me and said he had a word for me. I was like "ok, yeah what is it?" and he gets on his knees and looks like he is about to explode. He struggled to get the words out, but then told me he had a vision of me last night. I was wearing God's armor and I was a warrior and he said he knew that I have been waring for ages for my family. He said under the armor I was wearing a pure white dress and he said that God wanted me to know that yes I was a warrior, but first before that, I was His princess and the white dress had no spots or marks on it at all, but it was pure white. He said maybe I felt I had marks on the dress, but I didn't.

Then in the second lesson, we heard a siren go off and were told that it was a tornado warning siren. Within a few minutes we were told that a tornado was destined to hit our area within 12 minutes. Just on Sunday over 130 people were killed in a nearby area called Joplin, which is about three hours south of Kansas City and the tornado also caused absolutely devastating damage to houses, other buildings, trees and cars. So I could sense the fear and anxiety building up in the room. We were instructed to crouch down low and line up along the interior walls of the classroom, well away from the windows.

Of course being in the room with one of the leaders at IHOP, we turned this time into an amazing prayer time. Over 300 students and staff prayed in tongues, read scripture, sang songs and said prayers into the microphone.

Our leader, Corey Stark, shared a testimony about how when he was at the International House of Prayer in Indiana, he received similar news about a tornado about to hit their area. He said he couldn't believe it because it looked so calm and pleasant outside, but then within a few seconds, the sky turned green and they could see this amazing tornado approaching. he said God gave him this amazing boldness and he and two other leaders and three teenage girls stood out in the field and commanded the tornado to pass around their site in Jesus Name. As they stood outside praying, they saw a huge tree get torn out of the ground and fly over their heads, but then sure enough, the tornado missed their site and not a single tree, car, building, person, etc.. was in any way harmed.

Similarly, some students watched the tornado today pass by us. How great is our God!

Then Brooke bought me lunch from a place called Taco Bell and we ate it in the car on the way to the prayer room. In the prayer room, I prayed a lot for my family, friends back home, friends here in KC and myself. Then I felt that I needed to kneel down again at the front of the room and pray, which as usual brought on a flood of tears. Actually, I didn't cry as much as usual. My tears dried up and I only spent about 40 minutes on my knees. I returned to my seat feeling a little self conscious. Then Brooke and I met up outside to go and get the prophetic ministry we had signed up for.

Brooke's 32nd b'day dinner last night

Day off

Well today was our one day off schedule and weirdly enough I again felt that I needed to be in the prayer room, so I got up early and headed out early. I was not hungry so I fasted breaky and I prayed in the spirit on the beautiful walk down through sunshine. I bumped into Zack outside and he asked why I was there at the prayer room and I told him I just felt I was meant to be there. He said he liked that. My prayer time was amazing. I did my confessions, prayed loads of scriptures, emailed friends to receive their prayer points, compiled a document just of prayer points and prayed over each person one by one, I joined rapid fire prayer (praying for governmental leaders in America), went to the cafe where I drank coffee and prayed some psalms over my family, then I went back in and did some study on Revelation for our quiz tomorrow.

When I stood in the rapid fire prayer line, I noticed a guy looking at me. He is a bit taller than me with dark brown hair and blue eyes and glasses. He is one of the worship singers that sings regularly on the stage. He also went to the cafe when I did and opened the door for me and was next to me in the queue. I kind of had the impression he wanted to talk to me, but I felt too shy to talk so I raced outside and then sat on the chairs outside the door of the prayer room drinking my vegetable juice. I saw him open the door to re-enter the room and he looked at me. Haha, oh why do I have some a complex about talking to guys. I have to get over my complex and just make friends with them and treat them like brothers.

The whole idea of marrying an American guy totally freaks me out, but it would make sense if I met my husband at IHOP, I mean where else will I find a guy that is passionate about prayer like I am. Australia has run out of single guys my age, so I figure God must have brought me to this side of the world to partner me up with someone. Oh Lord, thank you that Your mouth has given the order and Your Spirit will gather us together. Your timing is the perfect timing. I know you do not have the same concept of time as we do down here on earth. One day in your time is like a thousand days in mine.

Later Brooke came to get some prayer in the healing rooms and we left afterwards. I asked her what she went up to for prayer and she said her anger and frustration towards classmates. I thought that was absolutely hilarious. I just love her so much as a friend. She is really open and honest about how she feels all the time.

Then we went to Price Choppers and I bought some groceries and then we headed back to her house for lunch. She made me a hot dog and some spinach, broccoli and cheese salad. I was meant to be fasting, but I have noticed I am getting really skinny from all the fasting and I reasoned that I had already had a great morning in prayer, so what the heck? We then went to the all staff meeting, but we snuck out at 5.30pm like naughty little kids :-) I had to go cos I had shopping in Brooke's car and it would have been so challenging to try and get it another day. I am so grateful to Brooke for driving me around. I will have to make some new friends if I do Track II and she goes back to Michigan.

The presence of God

Well this morning we had workmen again, so I couldn't sleep in. Agggh! ...so again, I had a very rushed morning and went down to the prayer room. This time Justin Rizzo was leading worship and just like last Saturday, it was totally amazing. The presence of God was so thick and I sat at a desk, but then felt as though the Holy Spirit was wooing me to kneel at the front of the prayer room again. I was embarrassed to go to the front. There were two big druggy-looking guys on their knees, one covered in tattoos and it was touching to watch them. I wrestled a bit with God and fear of man, but then obeyed the Holy Spirit.

As I knelt down, I felt really shy and awkward and bowed my head low. Almost immediately, God's presence overwhelmed me and I was weeping and weeping and weeping as I prayed again for my family and friends. I couldn't raise my head, I don't know why. I didn't see who was around me, I just looked ahead and saw the worship leader and singers. I only recognised the leader's face because I watched him last Saturday. His worship leading seems to result in the greatest anointing. I knelt and prayed and wept for over an hour, then left the prayer room at 10am and came home cos I wanted to clean myself up.

What's with that? What is God doing in my heart? Why do I have these weird emotional encounters? I wish I was not such a mess, but i can't help it. I love them and everything within me just craves God's presence and nearness, but I hate being unable to control my emotions and not being able to explain to anyone why I am the way I am. I wonder if anyone around me understands what it is like. there must be someone.... oh how I wish God would connect me with them.