Cutting soul ties

Gosh I love my little niece so much and I can feel how much she loves me. It hurts so much that I have to say goodbye again to her and I can't explain why I'm going because she is so young she doesn't understand. It makes it harder because she also loves her grandma and her grandma's dogs and because Julz and mum don't talk to each other, Angel can't see them while I am away. It hurts thinking she will not be able to come to this house again, or if she comes, her little heart will be sad because I wont be in it....but instead far far away on the other side of the world.

My heart just feels so sad tonight. It is such a huge sacrifice to follow God's will for my life, but I really believe I am meant to go. I feel really unhappy remaining in Perth. In contrast when I think about Kansas City, I can hardly contain the excitement.... yet these ties to my family hurt me so much. I feel like this is such a huge leap for me - to let go of everything familiar, sell everything of value, pack up my house and go to a city where I don't know a single person on the other side of the world and I can barely contact my family because they don't have skype, don't answer their phones, hardly use email ...they are just so busy caught up in their lives. Why is my life so hard? Why do I have to have such a different call to everyone I know?

Somehow the sacrifices, the challenges, the trials, the hardships will all be worth it. The best days are yet to come.